Trouble in Paradise

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Part 1

I splashed my face with ice cold water and stood looking at my reflection in the mirror. This was the moment I’d been waiting for all year…my big chance, yet I was so nervous, I couldn’t even stand up straight. My best friend came into the toilets and stood beside me. “They’re ready.” I nodded and followed her out, holding my stomach. The nausea was setting in quite badly now. I was stood backstage at the end of year talent show at school, and I was on next. I groaned as I saw my ex-boyfriend walking towards me. “We need to talk.” “No, we don’t.” “You can’t just tell me that it’s over and expect me to be ok with it.” “Why not?” “Because you can’t, it’s not fair.” “Fine, I’ll explain later. Just get on stage and sing.” I pushed him away from me and tried to refocus my attention. The curtain went up, and the intro chord sounded as we stepped onto the stage. I looked around quickly, noticing that it was a full house. We took our places on stage and started the song.

:

Did I hear you right?
Cause I thought you said
Let's think it over
You have been my life
And I never planned
Growing old without you
Shadows bleeding through the light
Where the love once shined so bright
Came without a reason
Don't let go on us tonight
Love's not always black and white
Haven't I always loved you?

Me:

But when I need you
You're almost here
And I know that's not enough
And when I'm with you
I'm close to tears
'cause your only almost here

:

I would change the world
If I had a chance
Oh won't you let me
Treat me like a child
Throw your arms around me
Oh please protect me

Both:

Bruised and battered by your words
Days are shattered, now it hurts

:

Oh, haven't I always loved you?

Me:

But when I need you
You're almost here
And I know that's not enough
And when I'm with you
I'm close to tears
'cause your only almost here

Both:

Bruised and battered by your words
Days are shattered, now it hurts

:

Haven't I always loved you?

Me:

But when I need you
You're almost here

:

Well I never knew how far behind I'd left you

Me:

And when I hold you
You're almost here

:

Well I'm sorry that I took our love for granted

Me:

And now I'm with you
I'm close to tears

:

Cause I know I'm almost here

Both:

Only almost here

The song ended and we remained on stage as the crowd went wild. I looked over at , who smiled and gave me the thumbs up. I hadn’t heard any of the other acts, but I was pretty sure we’d nailed it. I smiled back, and then stepped off the stage. grabbed my arm to stop me running off. " , that was wicked. I reckon you guys pulled it off.” “Yeah. , can I talk to you about it later. I’m bursting for the loo.” I didn’t wait for a reply and ran towards the toilets. As soon as I was in there, I went into the first cubicle and threw up. I heard the door open and someone call my name. “I’m in here.” came in and gasped when she saw me slumped in the corner. “ , are you ok? What’s wrong? Are you ill?” I shook my head. “It’s just nerves. You know me; I never was good at performing in front of people.” She eyed me warily but nodded and helped me up. “Come on, ’s waiting for you.” I stopped in my tracks. “I can’t do it, . I can’t face him.” “What do you mean? Has something happened with you two?” “We broke up.” “What? Why?” “I just think it’s for the best. He’s too young to be tied down. He needs time to date other girls and find the one he really wants to be with.” “What if that’s you?” “It isn’t. Come on, I don’t want to miss the results.” I walked out of the toilets, leaving a very shocked behind, just in time to hear my name being announced. I sprinted back to the hall, where was waiting for me. “We won, !” I threw myself at him, shrieking as he span me around. We walked up onto the stage hand in hand to collect our award. Several minutes later, we were outside the building, still on a high after our performance. “What’s going on with us, ?” “There is no us. Not anymore.” “But why?” “We’re young; I don’t think we should be getting that serious about anyone yet. I just think we both need time to think about this, and not rush into anything.” “We were young two years ago. It didn’t stop you then, why now?” “Things have changed. I’ve changed, and I just don’t feel the same way anymore. I don’t feel the spark.” “So you don’t love me anymore, is that what you’re saying?” “ , the last thing I wanted was this. I never meant to hurt you, but I can’t lie to myself anymore. I’m sorry.” “No, I’m sorry. I’m sorry I ever told you I loved you, I’m sorry I ever thought we were good together and I’m sorry I wasn’t good enough for you.” He backed away slowly, catching my eye and holding it as he finished speaking. “But most of all, I’m sorry for wasting the last two years of my life on someone who doesn’t feel the same. I guess I’ll see you around.” And that was it…the book was closed on that chapter of my life. Two of the best years of my life had come to a bitter end because of 10 minutes of stupidity. Why hadn’t I told him I was pregnant instead of pushing him away?

~two weeks later~

It was the night of our leavers do, and I still hadn’t had a chance to speak to since the talent show. It wasn’t until me and arrived that I would realise exactly how much it had hurt to lose him. We walked into the already crowded hall, where the events had developed two weeks ago to find with , my biggest enemy. It turned out he had asked her to the prom to get back at me, not because he wanted to. As soon as I saw them, I stopped dead in my tracks. I didn’t know what to do, but I felt so low for treating him the way I had. I felt the tears spring to my eyes, and not wanting to give him the satisfaction of seeing me cry, I ran out, closely followed by . “ , , wait! He’s doing it to get back at you, don’t let him bring you down.” “I can’t help it . It hurts so much. I should have just told him the truth instead of lying, and maybe I wouldn’t have lost him. I love him, I want him back. What have I done?” There was a slight pause, and then I heard her step away. “I’m going to leave you two to talk, cos it sounds like you’ve got a lot to sort out.” I sniffed and looked up at , who was instantly kneeling on the floor next to me. He cupped my face in his hands and wiped my tears away with his thumbs. “ , I’m so sorry babe. I never meant to make you cry…after what you said, I didn’t think you cared, and I just wanted someone to make me feel loved again.” “But why her? Of all the people in the school, you picked her. You know the history with me and , why did you pick her? I would have been jealous of any girl; it would have hurt me to see you with any other girl, so why did you go for ?” “I really wanted to hurt you. I knew that seeing me with any old girl wouldn’t make you feel bad, so I had to pick the one person I knew it would break your heart to see me with. She means nothing.” I pushed his hands away and straightened out. “She’s not the only one. Just get back to her, , she’s probably sent out a search party already.” “I don’t care. What do I have to do to prove to you that I love you, not her?” “Just leave me alone. I can’t do this now.” He caught my arm as I turned to walk away. “Not until you tell me what’s going on. , three weeks ago, we were fine. What happened to make you feel that we shouldn’t be together?” “I just think we need some time apart, that’s all. It’s just hit me that we are never going to be with anyone else.” “Bullshit! I’m not going to leave until you tell me why we broke up. Don’t you think I deserve that much?” I sniffed again and turned to face him. “I’ve already told you. Just leave me alone, please.” I stood frozen in shock as he stepped towards me and pulled me into a hug. Still crying, I wrapped my arms around his neck and buried my face in his shoulder. “Babe, please tell me what’s wrong. I hate seeing you so upset.” “It doesn’t matter, I’m just being stupid.” “Let me be the judge of that.” He led me over to a bench just outside the school. “I…promise you won’t hate me.” “I could never hate you. Just tell me, please.” “I’m pregnant. I found out last month, but I didn’t know how to tell you. I thought you wouldn’t want anything to do with me if I told you, so I kept it a secret and broke up with you so I wouldn’t have to deal with it.”

Part 2

He stood there, open mouthed for what seemed like an eternity. " , say something, please." "Like what? Shit , a baby. I mean, we're only just old enough to look after ourselves. How are we going to look after a baby?" "So you are mad at me?" "No! No, I'm not. I just...do you see where I'm coming from. , we are sixteen, that's nowhere near old enough to bring a baby into this world." I nodded, still upset about his reaction. "Babe, don't be like this. You know I'm right, it's just not possible." "Be like what exactly ! This is our baby you're talking about. It's a little person, and you are just acting as though it's no skin off your back. Now you know why I didn't tell you earlier." " , don't! Just....don't. I want to be there for you, and I want to help you through this, but it's like you said. This is OUR baby, so I should be allowed to have an opinion on it, right?" "I guess." "Well, then, here's what I think. We are too young to have a kid, but I know how against abortions you are, so if it means that much to you, keep the baby." "Really?" "Yeah. You know I'll stand by you whatever you decide, you're my girlfriend and I love you." I didn't know how to react at that. Was he being serious, or was he saying it because he knew that's what I wanted to hear? "Can we skip prom? I really don't want to spend the whole evening with glued to me. You know I can't stand the girl." "You and me both. Then again, you invited her, it would be quite rude not to go. You know how sensitive she is." He went pale and looked round at me in disbelief. "Please tell me you're kidding?" I ruffled his hair and giggled. "Course I am you muppet. She deserves it, the cow. Come on, let's get out of here." I linked arms with him and we walked away from the school towards the park. I hadn't realised it was quite so cold, and my prom dress didn't exactly help keep me warm. I shivered slightly and instantly took off his jacket and wrapped it around me. "Thanks, but aren't you going to be cold like that?" "Nah, I'm cool." I laughed as he shivered. "Look, take your jacket back. I've got a better idea." I handed it back to him and he put it on. "Now, come over here and give me a hug from behind. That way, you're not cold cos you've got your jacket on, and I'm not cold cos I've got you wrapped around me." He hesitantly stepped forwards and wrapped his arms around my waist. " , relax. I don't bite." I leaned back into him slightly and smiled as his lips grazed the back of my neck. "I missed you." "Me too."

I almost couldn't believe how ell he was taking the news. I'd expected him to be shocked, but I never in a million years thought that he'd be so supportive over the whole situation. After all, it was like he said - we were sixteen. Barely old enough to look after ourselves, yet here we were, preparing for parenthood. I don't know how I would have coped without him. Despite breaking up with him when I found out the news, I hadn't wanted to be a single mother. I'd cried myself to sleep every night, waiting for him to call me and say that he didn't understand why this was happening. Obviously, he never did, and as time went by I'd begun to lose hope that we were ever going to get back together. I'm glad we're both stubborn as mules though, because we didn't give up on us. I didn't want to, and he wouldn't let me. That's probably why he came to speak to me on prom night. I'd spent so long ignoring him, yet he still kept trying. That was why I loved him, and also why I didn't want to let him go. Telling our parents was an impossible task. My mum and dad had never approved of my relationship with him. They'd heard the rumours about him, and chose to believe them. They wouldn't listen when I told them he wasn't like that. Not anymore. I still remember that night clearly. I don't think I've ever been that scared before.

*flashback*

" , it's ok, babe. They won't be that mad, not when they see I'm standing by you." " , you keep telling yourself that. Who knows, you might end up believing it." I smiled as he grabbed my hand and squeezed it reassuringly. "Ready?" "As I'll ever be." We walked into the living room, hand in hand, and my parents instantly stopped their conversation and looked at us. " , what is this boy doing here?" "MUM! His name is and he's here because we have something to tell you. Sit down." She did as I said, all the time muttering obscenities under her breath. "I don't understand why you took him back. You know what people say about him." "Firstly, I broke up with him because of what I'm about to tell you. I'm lucky he took me back. Secondly, I don't care what people say about him. I'm with him because I love him, and they don't know him like I do. Thirdly, you're going to be a grandmother. I'm pregnant." As soon as the words left my mouth, she closed her own and gawped at me in shock. "P-p-pregnant? You are 16 years old young lady. I'm presuming the baby is 's." "Of course it is. What do you take me for?" "Right now, you don't want to know. 16 years old! Your whole life going down the drain because of his inability to keep his trousers zipped." I was about to reply, but held me back.

I was so angry at them both for treating him like that. It wasn't all his fault, I'd played a part too. I guess they just didn't want to see their perfect little girl in a bad light, but this time, I didn't think they had a choice. I was pregnant, it was a reality we all had to face. We had a massive row, and we all said things that we didn't mean, but that's just how some things turn out. I know I regret the things I said, and regrets the things he said too. As for my parents...I'm not really sure what's going through their heads right now. All I knew was that I loved and I wasn't willing to stand to one side and let my parents hurl abuse at him. That was hardly fair on him.

My parents didn't accept the pregnancy for a long time. In fact, my dad disowned me and my mum threw me out. This was the worst possible scenario in my life right now. I was pregnant at 16, and I had nowhere to go. "Babe, it's not a problem. Move in with us, I'm sure my parents won't mind." " , I don't know...I'd love to, but I can't depend on you to...god, this is so hard." I burst into tears and he wrapped his arms around me. "Come on, don't cry. You know I love you, we can get through this." "We shouldn't have to . My parents should support me, it's their duty to. It's not exactly like they were any older when they had me. I just don't understand it." "Maybe, they realised how hard it was, and they don't want you to struggle." "Then why are they pushing me away. That's not what parents should do. You heard them, they never want to see me again." "You'll have to change their minds, won't you. , you're their only daughter, they might be angry right now, but I'm sure it won't last long. If they love you as much as I do, there's no way they'll let you go."

Part 3

I knew he was right. It wasn't the first time I'd had a serious argument with my parents and I was sure it wouldn't be the last. After all, they had gone through this when they were my age. They wouldn't give up on me now, I was sure of it. Just to be on the safe side, I decided to take up on his offer and move in with his family. When my parents were ready, they'd come and find me and we'd sort this whole mess out.

Unfortunately, it took them a lot longer to back down that I thought it would. It seems I inherited my stubborn streak from them, and it wasn't until I was six months pregnant and had a considerable bump that they showed up at the doorstep bearing gifts. I gave them the cold shoulder at first. It's not that I didn't want to be on speaking terms with them again...I just wanted to show them how much they had hurt me, and the only way I could do that was by hurting them back. I woke up early because the baby was kicking and paced around the room anxiously. and the guys were doing a series of performances around the country to see if anyone wanted to sign them, and I didn't know if I could cope with him being away for so long so close to the due date. I'd already been excused from school, so I spent all day around the house. I had the feeling I was starting to annoy everybody, and just wanted my parents to let me go home.

I voiced my concerns to when he woke up a few hours later, and he did what he could to reassure me that I wasn't in the way and everyone loved having me there. I, on the other hand, wasn't convinced, and burst out crying when he was about to get in the car. " , babe, we've been through this, ok. Mum doesn't mind you being here. If she did, she'd make it more than clear. I'm only a phone call away, if anything happens, call me and I'll be here as soon as I can. I love you." I hugged him, clutching onto him as though my life depended on it and continued crying. "I don't want you to go. What happens if something goes wrong with the baby and you can't get here on time." "Don't worry, I'll be here. You know I wouldn't leave you to cope with this on your own. Look, if you're that worried, give your parents a call. It's about time someone brought them back down to earth." I needn’t have worried though. Almost as soon as the words were out of his mouth, I saw the familiar red car pull up in the ' driveway. My parents got out and walked towards me. " , we're sorry darling. We over-reacted, we should have known would stand by you. He's a decent boy." I merely nodded to acknowledge what they had said and turned back to . "Promise you'll call me every day." "I promise. And don't overdo it, you need to rest." He knelt down and kissed the bump. "You let me know if she gives you any trouble." "We don't know it's a girl yet." "I was talking to the baby." He laughed and I scowled at him, before pulling him in for a kiss. "I love you." "Love you too. Be careful, I'll be home next month." He got in the car and blew me a kiss before turning around so I wouldn't see him crying.

I waited until the car was out of sight before turning to go back in. " , don't walk away from me. We need to talk." I stopped dead in my tracks and turned to face them, allowing all the pain and anger to spill out through the tone of my voice. "I have got nothing to say to either of you. You made your feelings perfectly clear, it's too late to change your minds now." My mum went to reply, but decided against it and left the speaking to my dad. " , it's not that we don't love you, or that we're ashamed of you in any way. After everything me and your mother went through after you were born... you know how much of a struggle it was. We just didn't expect this." "And you think I did. I didn't purposely go out and get myself pregnant dad. It wasn't planned or anything, it just happened. I wasn't expecting you and mum to be over the moon, I just hoped you'd give me a bit of support or advice, that's all."

Part 4

"We are so sorry. We know what we did was wrong, and we were hoping you'd give us another chance. Move back in with us ." I hesitated slightly. This was what I'd been waiting for, but now I wasn't sure I wanted to leave. I had to at least wait for to come back, so we could talk it through. I didn’t want to move back in with my parents only to upset him when he came back to find I wasn’t there. I knew I was probably being stupid as far as not fitting in with his family was concerned, but I didn’t want to intrude for longer than I had to. I looked back at my parents and shook my head reluctantly. “It’s not that I don’t want to move back, it’s just I have to wait for to come back. I need to talk to him first, make sure that it’s ok with him. Don’t worry, I will definitely be coming home soon.”

The weeks flew by, and before I knew it, was back and I was suddenly stuck for words. I didn’t know how to tell him I was moving back home. He’d done so much for me, it didn’t seem right leaving him now. I walked over to him and wrapped my arms around him, giving him a kiss on the cheek. “Welcome back babe.” He turned around and hugged me properly. I buried my face in his shoulder, not wanting this moment to end, so I wouldn’t have to tell him. “What’s up?” I looked up, startled by his voice. “Nothing, I was just thinking.” “About what?” “Moving back home. They came round after you left, and I said I’d wait for you to come back so we could talk about it.” “Do you want to go?” “They’re my parents . I can’t avoid them forever. It wouldn’t be permanent, just until the baby’s born, then we could find a place of our own.” He grabbed my shoulders to calm me down, as I was now in full flow. “It’s ok, you don’t have to explain. If you want to move back home, that’s fine with me. Whatever makes you happy.” I smiled and rested my head on his shoulder again, just enjoying his company. “Have I ever told you I love you?” “Only every day.”

He helped me get all my bags packed and ready, and even gave me a lift to my parents house. I stood on the doorstep clutching my bags and took a few deep breaths before gathering the courage to ring the doorbell. I felt squeeze my free hand as I heard Bailey, the family dog, bark, indicating that someone was on their way. The door swung open and my mum appeared, taking my bags off me. “You shouldn’t be carrying anything heavy in your condition. Come in, both of you. , your father’s on his way, he had to pick up something from the shop. Make yourselves at home, I’ll be right with you. I’ll just take these bags upstairs.” She led us into the living room and shut the door. We heard her run up the stairs and I breathed a sigh of relief. I’d half expected her to throw out before giving him a chance, but it seemed like she really wanted me to stay, so she’d decided to be nice to him. I knew that was the only reason she was acting like that, but right now, I didn’t really care. I was just happy to be home again.

I felt the baby kick and took ’s hand, placing it on the bump. He smiled as the baby kicked again. “Babe, that’s amazing.” “I know. It kicked for the first time last week. It quite scared me actually, I wasn’t expecting it.” “That’s our baby in there, I can’t wait until he’s born.” “He?” “Or she…sorry, I wasn’t thinking.” I smiled and kissed him. “it’s ok, as long as it’s a healthy baby with ten fingers and ten toes, I couldn’t really care whether it’s a boy or a girl.” My mum walked into the room carrying a tray with tea and biscuits, and placed it down on the table. “Sorry, I didn’t realise you were…having a moment. I’ll come back in a bit.” “Mum, don’t be silly, sit down, I haven’t seen you for ages.”