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Part 1
My hands were shaking as I reached for the little white stick on the table. The two minutes that had just passed seemed
like an eternity. I didn't know what I was going to do if it showed what I was expecting it to. I was 19 years old, still
at uni and with no money. Up until a few weeks ago, having a baby was one of the top things on my list. But that had been
back when I had a Premiership footballer boyfriend to fall back on. Now I was single, with no money and no roof over my head,
it wasn't exactly a priority. At the same time, I knew there was no way I could get rid of it. It was a part of us. The only
part of us I had left. I couldn't let that go.
I took a deep breath and looked down, the single blue line confirming my suspicions. I was definately pregnant. I nervously
picked the phone up, dialling the number i knew like the back of my hand and very nearly backing out as it rang. He had a
right to know, but was i ready to tell him? "Hello?" "Er...hi. Its
." I paused to take a breath, suddenly realising just what kind of effect he had on me. I had a whole speech planned out,
and the minute I heard his voice, everything just flew straight out. "What do you want?" "Are you busy later?" "i've got training
in half an hour, but i can come over after that." "Good, i need to see you." "
, you're the one that ended it." "Yeah, i know. We need to talk." "What about?" "I can't tell you over the phone. Just come
round after training." "Alright. I'll see you later." I had to use all my inner strength to stop myself saying 'i love you'
as i let the phone fall away from my ear. I breathed out sharply as he hung up, feeling like a school girl all over again
as i struggled to regain my composure. I left the phone on the table and made a start on clearing the house up. I didn't want
him coming round when the house was a tip.
About an hour later, there was a knock on the door. It was far too early to be him, and I wasn't expecting anyone else.
Least of all who I found myself face to face with as I opened the door. "
, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at training?" He didn't answer but pushed past me and walked into the hallway.
"Come in why don't you?" "Don't get sarcastic! I'm not staying long. I just want to ask you something." "So ask." "What the
hell have you done to him?" "Who?" "
. You called him earlier and he's been in one hell of a foul mood since then." "I haven't done anything to him. It's not my
bloody fault your best friend is a moody fuck, is it?" "He was fine before you called. What did you say to him?" "That's between
me and him. It's got nothing to do with you or anyone else for that matter." "
, you broke up with him, you can't do this!" "Yeah, because he cheated on me! I don't have to explain myself to you
. I will tell
what i have to tell him when he gets here. Kindly butt out. It's got nothing to do with you." "It's got everything to do with
me when it's affecting the way he's training." "Then just go back to training, tell him and the rest of them I'm pregnant
and just leave me alone!" "You're w...
's, right?" "Of course it is!" "He's going to be over the moon." "Is he?" "Of course he is.
, he's mad about you! He'd never say it, but he still loves you. He knows what he did was wrong, he'd give anything to have
you back. He just needs another chance." "I can't
. He hurt me." "You can't take this away from him. You know how much he wants to be a dad." "And he will be. I'm not going
to take that away from him! I just don't know if I can do this alone." "He's going to support you." "I don't want his money!
I want him to be a father, money means nothing to me." "What's stopping you?" "I can't go through that again
. I want him back, and I love him, but it's going to take time." "You've got your whole lives ahead of you. One step at a
time yeah?" I nodded slowly. "Great. I'd better get back before the gaffer blows his top. See you later. And call me if you
need anything, alright." "Thanks, I will." I closed the door behind him, already feeling miles better about the situation.
Part 2
I was curled up on the sofa with my feet up when the doorbell rang for the second time that day. I jumped up, quickly checking
my reflection it the mirror in the hallway before opening the door. He was stood with his back to me, but as soon as he heard
the door open, he turned around. I felt my heart catch in my throat as my eyes met his. “hey” “hi. Come
in.” “thanks.” I stepped aside to let him in. “so, what’s the big emergency?” “have
a seat.” “I’m fine. I just want to get this out of the way, I can’t stay long.” “ok, erm…well,
you – we…I’m pregnant.” I watched as his face paled and a slumped down onto the sofa, covering his
face with his hands. “are you sure?” I nodded. “I took the test this morning, that’s why I called.”
“so, what are you going to do? I mean, are you keeping it or what?” “of course I’m keeping it!
, I’ve wanted a baby for so long, I’m not likely to get rid of it now I’ve got one on the way.” “sorry,
I just thought…what with us breaking up. I wasn’t sure.” “it doesn’t change anything
. We’re not together anymore, but I know we both want this baby. I can’t get rid of it.” “you know
I’ll be there for you, don’t you?” “I’ve already spoken to
about this. I don’t want your money and I don’t need it. I just want you to be a father.” “whoa, hang
on.
knew? You told my best friend before you told me?” “
, it wasn’t like that ok. He came round and he was on my case. It just slipped out. I wanted you to be the first person
to hear about it.” “but you fucking told
you were pregnant before you told me? It’s my fucking baby
! I cant fucking believe that you told him before me.” “can you calm down? I already told you it wasn’t
planned or anything! Its not like I wanted to tell
before I told you.” “then why the fuck did you? He’s my best friend
! And you’re carrying my baby! Unless there’s something you’re not telling me.” “what?! You
think that…god
! I’m not a slapper.” “I never said that you were. I’m just finding it hard to explain to myself why
you’d tell
before you told me.” “because he was there, and I needed someone! He came round to see me and he didn’t
give a shit if he missed training or got in trouble with the gaffer.” “I’m the skipper! I cant be missing
training session whenever I feel like it. you of all people should know that!” “I want you to go.” “What?”
“can you just get the hell out of my house
. I didn’t invite you round here to have a fucking slanging match with you. I invited you to tell you that I’m
pregnant and you’re going to be a dad, and I’ve done that now, so just get out!” “
…” “im being serious
. Just leave!”
I looked up at him, my eyes glistening with unshed tears. “I’m not going anywhere. We need to sort this out.”
“I don’t want to. I can’t be around you anymore. I cant pretend everything’s ok, when every time you
come near me, my heart starts pounding and I can’t breathe. We’re over, and I don’t want us to be. I need
you
. I need to be with you.” "
, we...you ended it. You can't go back on it now." "I had my reasons for that, and you should know better than anyone what
they were. It's not my fault that i can't fall out of love with you as quickly as i fell in love." "i didn't mean it like
that. i'd love us to get back together, but i don't deserve it. i don't deserve you."
Part 3
There was an awkward silence between us for a few minutes before I finally worked up the courage to break it. "
?" He looked up, startled by the sound of my voice. "did you mean it? About us getting back together?" "Of course I meant
it.
, I know i've put you through so much shit, but I love you, and I want to be with you. I screwed up and I'm sorry. I just
want...I want you and this baby. i want a family." "Then maybe we should try again. For the baby's sake. I want him or her
to have a proper family." He stood up, wrapping me in a bear hug and nearly knocking the breath out of me. "Thank you for
giving me another chance. I can do this, I know i can." "Make sure you do, because if you screw up this time, that's it. No
more chances." "I won't need another chance. I won't screw up again."
We spent the next few hours discussing the terms on which he'd move back in. I didn't think he needed telling not to cheat
again. He knew this really was his last chance, and I respected him for admitting to his mistakes and trying to make it up
to me. I still hadn't forgiven him, I didn't think I ever fully would for what he put m through, but I loved him and I wanted
to try and make things work, as much for our sake as for the baby. We were in the middle of planning the nursery when his
phone rang. "Sorry, I need to get that. It's ." I nodded and he stepped outside
to take the call. "You alright, mate? Yeah, yeah, I'm at hers now. We're just sorting stuff out for the nursery. Thanks for
talking sense into me mate. I dunno what I'd do without you. Yeah, probably. Anyway, I'd better go, there's a lot to get through.
I'll be round later to pick some of my stuff up. Alright mate, see you later." "everything ok?" "Yeah, he just wanted to know
what time I'd be back tonight." "Oh right. I was thinking, we could paint it a neutral colour, that way it would suit a boy
or a girl." "You don't want to know then?" "Not really. I love surprises, you know that. If you want to know..." "No, it's
cool. Surprise it is." "Thank you." "Hey, I owe you." He tensed up slightly as I wrapped my arms around his waist, resting
my head on his chest, but he quickly relaxed and returned the hug, kissing the top of my head. "I missed this." "I missed
you."
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